


No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

by IHealRages



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Character Study, Internal Monologue, Regulus Black-centric, Sad, Sad Ending, other characters are only mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-10-31 17:13:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17853767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IHealRages/pseuds/IHealRages
Summary: It didn't matter.It didn’t matter. Sirius could hate him.It didn't matter. Because it was the first step to defeat the Dark Lord.It didn't matter. Because he was doing it and Sirius was safe.





	No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

-

Regulus knew from the moment he went to Hogwarts he would have no choice in his life.

The hat had shouted "Slytherin" and he’d stood gracefully, passing by his brother who was sat around the Gryffindor table and turning away from the distraught face he was given.

 

He’d taken a seat at the Slytherin table.  
The first new Slytherin of the year, and mother had been so proud.  
He'd thought maybe then Sirius would give him some respect instead of treating him like a useless little brother.

  
No such luck.

  
If anything it seemed like Sirius hated him, they had been close as kids but Regulus couldn't even talk to him anymore. As if all in Sirius's brain was 'Slytherin = evil.'

He'd lost the love of his brother just because he was a Slytherin.

No matter.

He had dealt with it, he had to.

Sirius had always been out of place, being kind, disobeying mother, joining Gryffindor.

 

Regulus wouldn't follow the same path as his brother.  
He wasn't allowed.

 

Mother always spoke of disowning him for acting out of pureblood standards.

No.

He couldn't follow Sirius.

  
Mother had plans, she told him now and then of the great things he would accomplish, of the new Lord rising that would make things better. Sirius just didn't understand. Sirius had friends, he trusted those friends. There was no one Regulus could trust. Severus was the closest friend he had, and he was sure neither of them really thought to use the word ‘friend’. More that they studied together and had equal hatred of the Marauders and equal enjoyment in watching that Lucius Malfoy make a fool of himself.

  
Sirius was lucky,  
Sirius was loved,  
He was unlucky,  
He was unloved,

But life went on.

 

Sirius became friends with a Potter, someone who could offer him protection. Even when they broke the rules everyone loved them. Well, except Professor McGonagall who lived in constant anguish. They could do what they liked, bully who they liked, and almost never get in real trouble. A few detentions wouldn't deter them.

 

No one had ever loved him. The thought of it made his stomach churn.

Mother would never use that word. It was 'common'. It was 'weakness'.

  
When you were a Slytherin you couldn't afford to be the troublemaker, to be weak. Teachers were against you from the start. Other houses called you evil and mocked you. Even within Slytherin the constant need to be superior was what united the house.

  
Lucius was kind only because he was of the noble house of Black. The fact that he'd began trying, and failing, to court Narcissa was an unwelcome addition. They were disgustingly cute together. And Lucius had paid both him and Severus to write her poems, find out Cissa's favourite flowers and other things.

  
Cissa of course, had already known all that.  
Cissa had made her choice.  
Cissa would be safe as a Malfoy.

  
In the end, Regulus thought, I never did make my own choice.

 

Sirius had,  
Sirius was safe.

 

He stepped on to the boat and looked across the lake. At least he could do this one thing for his brother after all the years of bitter hatred. 

  
It didn't matter.  
It didn’t matter. Sirius could hate him.  
It didn't matter. Because it was the first step to defeat the Dark Lord.  
It didn't matter. Because he was doing it and Sirius was safe.

  
…

  
Mother might cry, but she wouldn't show it. Perhaps she would move on, he'd only ever been a way for her to improve the noble house of Black.

  
The dark cold house of his childhood didn't seem very noble.  
It's hard to forget feelings of cold that seeps into your bones,   
or a loneliness to the point that your curled up on the floor, unable to breathe.

Mother didn’t care.  
Brother preferred his friends.  
Friends.

...

Regulus stepped off of the boat.

Maybe, if he'd had one of those he wouldn't have been coerced by mother. Like Sirius.  

 

He picked up the goblet.

"Kreacher," he said, voice barely above a whisper. "When I'm done take the locket back home, and leave me here. Never speak of this."

There was a lengthy pause before a quiet. "Yes, Master Regulus."

He drank.

 

Pain burned through every nerve in his body.  
He thought of Sirius and smiled.

This time, he'd made his own choice.   

-


End file.
